Handle with Care

1 Peter 3:7 – You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.

Guys, take notice that this verse is NOT a holy suggestion from God that we should casually consider. This is a command, and our choice to blow it off will have serious consequences….see the last eight words. If we read this and choose not to live this way in our marriage – our prayers to God WILL be hindered. So what does “hindered” really mean? Greek and English definitions gives us words like –interrupt, impede, frustrate, eliminate or to do away with.

None of these are acceptable options if we have thoughts of ever praying again, and desiring God’s answer. None of us wants our prayers to be “cut off”, or “eliminated”. So, what’s a fella to do?

 We must keep in mind that the woman we are married to is a personal gift from God Himself. She is also His precious child – His beloved daughter. Do you remember meeting your wife’s dad for the first time, or interviewing that scruffy teenager who wanted to go out with your daughter? Fathers care about the welfare of their daughters. God especially cares about His daughters welfare, and expects husbands to treat them with proper respect and appreciation.

The word used for “weaker” vessel actually refers to weak, as in fine china is weak. It is frail because it is so preciously made and highly valuable. When you hold a newborn baby, or carry a large bank deposit to the bank for your boss, you are more highly aware of the need to be careful and responsible. I remember vividly driving my car full of young boys to baseball tournaments, or the family van full of precious people on vacation. Every single time I was acutely aware of the responsibility on my shoulders to stay alert and careful.

That is what God is asking of each of us when it comes to caring for His daughter. He demands that we treat her with the utmost respect and care, and be personally accountable to Him for her welfare.

The question that must be asked of each of us is – how are we doing? How would our wife say we are doing? How would God say we are doing?

We are “husbands” – shepherds, guardians, stewards, protectors – of our wives. We cannot afford to fall asleep at the wheel without serious consequences. A good marriage won’t just happen. It takes continual effort on our part to be the leader, protector and provider we are called to be. We need to memorize this verse and ask God to show us every day how to better “understand” our wife, and treat her in such a way as to make Him proud.

Read marriage and relationship books. Pray for and with her. She is a fellow heir and worthy of our praise, encouragement, appreciation, understanding and love. Let’s do a better job of showing her (and her Dad).

Keep it up guys,

Huz

Because I Love You

        So – it’s mid-summer. Have you done anything spontaneously loving and nice for your wife this summer? Anniversary or birthday doesn’t count.

Have you surprised her with flowers, or a surprise gift or card or SOMETHING that shouts “I Love You” to her? Does she feel like the most important person in your life – today?

What a wonderful way to let your helper, partner, lover, best friend know how important she is to you. One of her most crucial needs is to know just that. That she is valuable, needed, necessary – and that she is doing a good job.

We ALL need to know those things don’t we? If the kids are home for summer – she is in even more need of some encouragement. If you don’t have the money, just write her a handwritten note. Do something that shows her you are thinking about her, and that you really appreciate who she is as a person (not just what she does for you).

Send her an email. Write a sappy note and put it under her pillow. Get a babysitter and go out this weekend – simple is good. Cook hotdogs at a park – do something together – just the two of you. OR, tell her to take Saturday off – and go out with a girlfriend – or just have some time for herself – and you will take the kids – ALL DAY. What a man!!!! Honestly – think of your wife’s “love language”, and DO something to love her well. Ask God to show you if you don’t already have an idea.

Real Men…………..  “love their wife “as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her”

Do something. Be pro-active. Don’t put it off. Don’t wait until she has done something nice for you and for heaven’s sake, don’t do it expecting sex in return….. not good.

Have fun,

Huz

The Perfect Gift

 

There’s nothing more fun that finding that “perfect gift” for your wife on that special occasion. And, what wife would not be thrilled out of her head to get her own pair of colorful, comfortable, stylish airpants. Yes, you will both be the talk of the beach, or neighborhood pool – trust me.

If you missed the airpants craze  a few decades ago don’t fret. There are other gifts that will make your wife feel just about as special.

Kidding aside, I wanted to encourage you to give your wife the one gift she desires most – YOU. What she really wants, in her heart of hearts, is your presence, your time, and your attention. It’s not enough to be in the room but reading the paper, or watching your favorite reality show. She would love to have your undistracted presence. Emotional presence is different that physical presence.

I want to encourage all of us to set aside some time – even 15 minutes – and really engage our wife. Look into her eyes. Ask her about her day. Listen to what she is saying when she talks about work, or the kids, or what she is concerned about. Don’t try to fix it. Don’t try to figure it out. Just listen. Respond to her questions with better words than “fine” and  “good” .

God commands us to live with our wife “in an understanding way”. How can we understand if we never engage, and how can we engage if we never set aside real time to do so? Let’s put our agendas and selfish ways aside for a few minutes this weekend and spend a little face to face time with our wife. Let’s be deliberate about loving her by giving her a very precious gift – ourselves. She was created to be by our side, to be our helpmeet, our closest friend and companion. She longs to be with you…………….. Give it a try, and see what God does in your relationship..

Huz