How You Look at It

My son is a receiver on his junior high football team – and a pretty good one – well I guess all dads’ think that about their son’s.  But during one recent game they threw him a pass when he was wide open and he dropped the ball.  That was not like him so after the game I asked him what he was thinking during the play.

He said, “Dad, I was so wide open all I could think was “don’t drop the ball’ and then I dropped it.”

That reminded me of a golf lesson I once had.  Standing on the tee of a short hole with water nearly encircling the green, the instructor looked at me and asked what I was thinking about.  I told him, “There is a lot of water around that green.”  He laughed and said encouragingly, “But, there isn’t any water on the green, focus on the positive not the negative.”  Seems it is human nature to focus on the negative, and not always see the positive.

Seems like this malady is all around me.  I often catch myself thinking about the negative instead of focusing on the positive.  Then it hit me, when Jesus looks at us he only sees the positive.  As He looks at my life He focuses on what I have done and can do instead of the negative things that I have done.  He doesn’t see all the “water” in my life, all He sees is a big green with lots of landing area.  So if I am going to be like Jesus and think like Jesus, I need to focus on positive outcomes instead of negative, which I think is Jesus’ nature – and the nature (image) we were created to have.

We need to bring this Jesus Nature into our marriages.  We need to focus on the positive instead of picking at the negative.  Think about all the wonderful things that your wife does for you every day, and focus on that.  Focus on your feelings the first time you ever saw your wife.  Don’t waste time and energy thinking about the negative things that could happen.  What’s so difficult about noticing all the positive things and then thanking her for them?  We need to make the choice to think and focus on all the positive things our wife does to complete us.

Let’s start adding Jesus Nature to our daily thinking about our wife and our marriage.

I got to share a great lesson with my son that day about focus and positive thinking.  He was able to change his thoughts and has caught plenty of footballs since our discussion.  He was also able to apply “Jesus nature” in a specific area of his life and now understands the power of positive thinking.  I hope you will join me in experiencing the joy that positive thinking, and “Jesus nature” brings to our marriage.



About Rob

Married to my high school sweetheart for 40 years. Blessed to be a frequent speaker at marriage and men's conferences, retreats and seminars. Author of 4 books on marriage. Check out resources at

3 responses to “How You Look at It

  1. I think you have remarked some very interesting points , highest regards for your post.

  2. The power of our minds amazes me – so often, what you think of comes true. Approaching a problem with the mindset that “this is going to be hard” or “this will be so easy” often is the difference in making it seem that way.

    I love the image of Jesus looking at me through that mind-set. That is worth remembering every single day.

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