God is Pretty Smart

God says “he who loves his wife, loves himself”. At first it sounds pretty selfish, but in reality it is a very cool marriage law of God. Just like “he who steps off a building will fall to the ground”. He is stating what the result will be if you do something.

So, if we (husbands) will do what He commands us to do, which is to “love our wives, as He loves the church”, and “give ourselves up for her” – ie: die to our selfishness and what we think we deserve – the results will be very nice.

He created our wives to be responders to love and affection. We too crave the same thing, but are too macho to admit it. But, somehow we just think that if we bring home a paycheck and occasionally buy her something – she will shower us with affection, affirmation, praise and, oh yeah, sex.

So, here’s the assignment…..

Shower your wife with love and affection and expect NOTHING for it. Just DO IT because God is worth it, and He commands us to. Honor Him by treating your wife the way He says – remembering the “love” is a verb. DO STUFF for her that shows your love and your desire to lighten her heavy load.

Examples include: help clean the dishes after a meal, or unload the dishwasher; take the kids away for an hour or two just to give her a brief break; go shopping, or to the grocery store with her; vacuum before the company comes over – or how about just asking “what can I do to help?”, and then gladly doing it. (Again – the goal is NOT sex – she can see right through that…).

The goal is to be obedient to God, and to please Him.

Amazing thing is – when we live to do that – He will in turn bless our socks off. We cannot out give or out bless God.

He who sows sparingly will reap sparingly, but he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Take this weekend to sow bountifully – and see how God, and your wife – respond.



About Rob

Married to my high school sweetheart for 40 years. Blessed to be a frequent speaker at marriage and men's conferences, retreats and seminars. Author of 4 books on marriage. Check out resources at allinmariage.org.

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